🌹 Squirtopia SquirtPads®
Keep your bed dry while you get nice and wet (plus a 10% discount).
The Sexy Directory is written and curated by me, Head Mistress Arielle Zadok. I’m an intimacy coordinator and sexologist who wants to make sex, love and intimacy a lot less daunting and a lot more fun. If you’d like to read a more in depth review, you’ll find that after the photo gallery
I can’t remember if it was the brilliance of the term SquirtPad® that got me, or the mermaid logo (I mean with a name like mine how could I resist), but what I can tell you is that when I finally learned about SquirtPads® I immediately thought about all the wet spots my ex and I would leave on his bed… that man could make me squirt and boy did we make a mess. We definitely could have used a SquirtPad®… or two.
What Is This Thing?
A SquirtPad® is a waterproof mat you can lay on your bed, couch, or whatever surface you’re playing on, that prevents bodily fluids, lube, and anything else you may be playing with from getting onto whatever is underneath.
How does it work?
SquirtPads® are made of 3 layers; A top layer made of soft, moisture wicking material, a middle layer that absorbs fluids, and a bottom layer that acts as a barrier. When it comes to squirt, or any other liquid, that means the liquid gets absorbed by the mat, and doesn’t make it’s way onto your bed. It’s great for squirting, period sex, anal sex, lots-of-lube sex and any other kind of sex that might get a little messy. It’s also good for babies, pets and people who like picnics, so while the focus is on messy sex, it’s good for lots of other things too.
Who Is It For?
Everyone! Singles, couples, groups… anyone who wants to keep their covers dry so they can get nice and wet without worry.
What Are The Materials?
The SquirtPad® is Free of PFAS & PFOA & is manufactured without any harmful chemicals or finishes. It holds up to 6 cups of fluids. That’s one hell of a good time.
Top Layer: 100% Polyester Middle Absorbent Layer: Blend of Cotton/Tencel®/Bamboo with polyester nylon Bottom Waterproof/Non-slip Layer: 75% Polyester 25% Polyurethane
What Is The Price Point?
Products range from $85.99 to $129.99
Where Can I Find It?
CLICK HERE and use offer code “TSD” to save 10% on your first Purchase
Follow along on instagram @Squirtopia
*DISCLAIMER: This is an affiliate link which means if you decide to purchase something, The Sexy Directory may receive a small commission. We love a scenario where everyone wins!
Anything Else I Need To Know?
They now sell Voudou Rainbow Ropes so if you’ve been thinking of trying out some Shibari, why not add some ropes to your order?
Last year I had the joy and pleasure of interviewing Michele Farmery, co-founder of Squirtopia (along with her husband, Thomas) for my show Birds & Bees Don’t Fck. Michele was living in Amsterdam at the time and when we wrapped the episode I let her know I’d be close by in Paris in a few months and if you listened to that episode then you’re likely not surprised to learn we immediately made plans to meet up.
It was on that trip that I finally got my hands on one of these soft, absorbent mats that I’d been lusting after. Michele and Thomas gifted me a brand new special edition Ruby Red Squirtpad® that had yet to be released at the time, and I loved it. Since I was in their home I also got to see all of the other colors. Purple, teal, magenta and black. All soft, all beautiful.
The mat itself is flat, meaning there are no patterns or fabric tufts to hide things so if something gets on there, it shows up. Which I don’t personally find to be a problem since you can easily throw these babies in the washer and dryer without thinking much about them. When there’s less of a mess, spot cleaning is a great option too.
I’ve used both water-based lube and oil based lube on this mat, and while I’m not necessarily dumping lube directly on them (though there has been a spill or two), I’m happy to report that I’ve yet to find an oil based lube that has stained my SquirtPad® permanently. The website does recommend using water-based lubes to prevent staining, but so far I haven’t had a problem with massage oil, coconut oil or oil-based lubricants. Sidenote: if you use condoms, oil based lubricants can break down the material and impact their efficacy, so lovers beware. All in all, the moisture wicking really works, even with lube!
I have a standard size SquirtPad® so it fits across most of my queen sized bed, though I have to be honest that with a partner, it’s not alway big enough for all the rolling around we do. I’d almost prefer to have the XL for partner play, but I wouldn’t let that stop you from getting a standard. It definitely still does the job and it covers the surface area I need it to - plus, I can just, you know, move it.
When it comes to solo play, taking out my SquirtPad® has become part of the ritual. Not only does it give me peace of mind for not worrying about things getting messy, but the ritual of taking out my mat, laying it across my bed and bringing more intention into my pleasure practice (i.e. masturbation), not only helps me and my body shift into the right headspace for play, but it also helps slow things down, which is something we could all use more of whether we’re playing solo or with a partner. There’s a sacredness to my SquirtPad® now, and I really love that.
The only thing to note about this mat is that it can sound a little ruffly. While the top is super smooth, the bottom waterproof layer does sound a bit like the fabric on my North Face shell jacket. You’ll hear it in the video below. That being said, if you’re worried about a little bit of ruffling coming from your blanket, it’s time to turn on some music, take a few deep breaths and focus on sensations like touch, smell or sight.
Okay, so you’re probably wondering if I did a water test and… of course I did! All I can say is that if it works for a glass of water, it’ll work for your squirt! Check out the video below:
One last thing. Since I got my SquirtPad® while traveling with a fully stuffed suitcase (Europe in winter, there’s no way around it!), I got to test out how it was for travel. It’s not necessarily the thinnest blanket so if you’re planning to go on holiday and you want to keep things dry, I’d recommend snagging a solo size to make packing a bit easier.
FINAL THOUGHTS
All in all I really like the Squirtopia SquirtPad®. Unlike most waterproof blankets, they lead with sex, it’s not just an afterthought. They’re proud to be a sexual wellness product normalizing conversations around sex and making it their mission to destigmatize things that shouldn’t be stigmatized like squirting, period sex, anal sex and advocating for your own pleasure. Plus, I love a couple on a mission!
The peace of mind you get from not worrying about getting squirt, cum, lube, or anything else on your bed (or couch) is worth it’s weight in gold when it comes to pleasure so this is definitely a must-have when it comes to pleasure products. Whether you’re an overthinker or just don’t want nasty shit on your bedding, I guarantee having a Squirtpad® will improve your sex life.
If you decide to buy one, don’t forget to use offer code “TSD” to get 10% off!
And if you want to watch or listen to my interview with Michele, check it out HERE.
Stay messy ya’ll,
xx
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